Poor Excuses

Dodging Duties? Excuses for Avoiding Responsibilities in a Relationship

excuses for avoiding responsibilites in a relationship

You may be interested in a related post here, Why You Didn’t Invite Them!

Relationships require effort, compromise, and accountability from both partners. However, some individuals may attempt to evade their responsibilities by making excuses. While there may be valid reasons for not fulfilling certain obligations, it’s important to recognize when someone is intentionally avoiding their duties.

In this article, we’ll explore common excuses for avoiding responsibilities and provide you with creative ways to address them.

Key Takeaways

  • Relationships require effort, compromise, and accountability from both partners.
  • Individuals may attempt to evade their responsibilities by making excuses.
  • Valid reasons for not fulfilling certain obligations do exist, but it’s important to differentiate them from excuses.
  • By recognizing tactics used to dodge duties, addressing common excuses, and fostering open communication, partners can work together to create a healthy and accountable dynamic in their relationship.

Understanding Relationship Responsibilities

Welcome to the daunting world of relationships, where “partnership” often morphs into “who can avoid responsibilities better.” Speaking of which, are you familiar with the concept of relationship obligations, or are you one of those partners who has perfected the art of dodging them?

Let’s clear the air and acknowledge that navigating relationship responsibilities can be tricky, but that does not mean you should avoid them altogether. Responsibilities form the cornerstone of any successful relationship, and neglecting them inevitably leads to a failing partnership.

Dodging Duties
Dodging Duties

So, what are relationship responsibilities, you ask? Simply put, they are the commitments you make to your partner and your relationship. These can range from small acts of kindness, such as helping with household chores, to more significant commitments like emotional support and shared decision-making.

Failure to fulfill these relationship responsibilities can lead to resentment and dissatisfaction in the partnership. Avoiding commitments in a partnership can also trigger feelings of mistrust and insecurity, ultimately leading to a disconnection between partners.

Now, don’t start panicking; it’s essential to understand that fulfilling these relationship obligations isn’t always a walk in the park. Some genuine reasons, such as illness or work demands, can make fulfilling responsibilities challenging. However, it’s the constant avoidance of these responsibilities that becomes problematic.

Pro Tip: Avoiding relationship responsibilities is like a ticking time bomb; it will eventually explode in your face.

To establish a healthy relationship dynamic, it’s crucial to understand the significance of fulfilling relationship responsibilities. By prioritizing these responsibilities and creating a shared sense of accountability, both partners can contribute to the success of their relationship.

Recognizing Dodging Tactics

Relationship responsibilities can be daunting, and it’s understandable to feel overwhelmed at times. However, some individuals take it to the next level and actively dodge their obligations in a relationship, leaving their partner to pick up the slack. Here are some dodging tactics to look out for:

  • The Blame Game: When your partner consistently blames you for not meeting their expectations, or their responsibilities in the relationship.
  • The Busy Bee: When your partner always claims to be too busy for any shared responsibilities or commitments together.
  • The Deflector: When your partner avoids taking responsibility by deflecting and changing the conversation topic whenever the subject of responsibilities comes up.
  • The Martyr: When your partner uses guilt-tripping tactics to make you take on their responsibilities, even though they should be aware of them.
Dodging Duties
Dodging Duties

Shirking obligations in a couple’s dynamic is not healthy for either partner. Recognize these tactics and have an open and honest conversation with your partner about their neglect of their responsibilities in the relationship.

Valid Reasons for Shifting Responsibilities

Life is unpredictable, and sometimes circumstances beyond our control can interfere with our ability to fulfill relationship obligations. It’s important to recognize when someone has a valid reason for neglecting their responsibilities versus when they’re evading accountability. Here are a few reasons why someone may struggle to fulfill their duties:

  1. Health issues or personal crises: When you or your partner are dealing with a health issue or personal crisis, it’s natural to want to focus on your well-being. In such situations, communication is key to discuss how responsibilities can be temporarily shifted to ensure both partners are supported.
  2. Work-related demands: Work can be demanding, and sometimes it’s difficult to balance work commitments and relationship responsibilities. However, it’s essential to prioritize the relationship and establish realistic expectations for fulfilling your obligations.
  3. Communication breakdown: Communication breakdown can lead to misunderstandings and neglect of responsibilities. It’s important to foster open communication and address any issues before they snowball and result in evasion of accountability.
Dodging Duties
Dodging Duties

It’s crucial to differentiate legitimate reasons from excuses. If you or your partner is struggling to fulfill obligations, it’s essential to communicate and find a way to balance responsibilities effectively.

Common Excuses and How to Address Them

Admit it, perfection is an unattainable goal. Occasions will arise when either you or your partner find it challenging to meet your relationship obligations. However, there is a fine line between a legitimate reason and a flimsy excuse for avoiding obligations. Here are some common excuses people use to avoid responsibility and ways to address them:

  1. “I don’t have enough time.”

We all lead busy lives, but making time for your partner is crucial in maintaining a healthy relationship. If your partner is using lack of time as an excuse, try suggesting specific ways to prioritize your time together. Whether it’s scheduling a regular date night or setting aside time to have meaningful conversations, showing your partner that you value their time is key.

  1. “I’m not ready for commitment.”

Fear of commitment is a common excuse for avoiding relationship responsibilities. If this is the case, try to delve deeper into what your partner is truly afraid of. Is it a fear of losing independence, or a fear of being hurt? Once you understand their concerns, address them directly and work together to establish a comfortable pace for the relationship.

  1. “I’m not good at that.”

It’s okay to have strengths and weaknesses in a relationship. However, it’s important to make an effort to improve where you can. Encourage your partner to try new things and offer support along the way. If the task at hand is essential to the relationship, consider splitting responsibilities in a way that plays to each other’s strengths.

  1. “It’s not my job.”

A relationship is a partnership, and both parties should be willing to contribute equally. If your partner is shirking responsibilities, remind them of the obligations they agreed upon at the beginning of the relationship. Try to find a compromise that works for both of you, so no one feels overburdened.

  1. “I’m too stressed.”

Stress can be overwhelming, but it’s essential to find healthy ways to manage it. Encourage your partner to take time for self-care and consider how you can support them during stressful periods. However, it’s also important to remind them that neglecting relationship responsibilities can add to the stress in the long run.

Communication is key when addressing excuses for avoiding relationship responsibilities. Be patient and understanding, but also firm in establishing expectations and boundaries. With persistence and effort, you and your partner can create a healthy relationship dynamic based on accountability and mutual respect.

Open Communication and Setting Expectations

Failing relationship responsibilities can happen to the best of us. However, if you find yourself constantly evading your duties or feel like your partner is shirking their obligations, it’s time to sit down and have an honest conversation.

Start by expressing your concerns and being specific about the areas where you feel like you’re falling short or your partner is failing to meet expectations. Remember to use “I” statements to avoid sounding accusatory.

Dodging Duties
Dodging Duties

For example, instead of saying, “You never help with the dishes,” try saying, “I feel overwhelmed when I have to do all the dishes by myself. Can we come up with a plan to share this responsibility?”

Setting clear expectations is also crucial in establishing accountability. Have a conversation about what you each expect from one another in the relationship. This can include things like spending quality time together, being emotionally supportive, and fulfilling household chores.

Make sure to listen actively and be open to feedback. Remember, this is a two-way conversation and both partners should feel heard and respected.

Once you’ve established expectations, come up with a plan to create a more equal distribution of responsibilities. This may involve dividing household chores, setting aside designated time for each other, or seeking outside help if necessary.

Don’t forget to revisit these expectations and check in with each other regularly to ensure both partners are fulfilling their duties. Open communication and active participation in the relationship are key to avoiding responsibility evasion and creating a happy, healthy partnership.

Seeking Professional Help

Sometimes shirking obligations in a couple’s dynamic can become a persistent issue. You may have tried everything under the sun to encourage your partner to take responsibility, but nothing seems to work.

In such cases, seeking professional help can be a game-changer. Couples therapy is an excellent way to work through issues of relationship responsibility evasion in a constructive and safe environment.

Dodging Duties
Dodging Duties

Remember, relationship responsibility is a shared obligation, and both parties must actively participate in maintaining a healthy relationship. Seeking outside assistance shows a willingness to work towards a resolution.

Therapists can help you identify the root cause of the evasion and provide you with practical tips to address the behavior. They can teach you communication skills, help you establish shared expectations, and provide you with tools to navigate challenges as a team.

Don’t view seeking help as a sign of weakness; it takes courage to acknowledge your struggles and take steps towards overcoming them.

By working together with a qualified professional, you can gain insights into your relationship dynamics, break free from patterns of evasion, and create a stronger and more fulfilling partnership.


You’ve made it to the end of our exploration of dodging duties in relationships. We’ve covered a lot of ground, from understanding the importance of relationship responsibilities to recognizing dodging tactics, and even delving into creative ways to address common excuses. By now, you’re equipped with the tools and knowledge to hold yourself and your partner accountable in your relationship.

Shirking obligations in a couple’s dynamic can lead to a whole host of issues, from resentment to mistrust. Embracing responsibility and actively participating in your relationship can prevent these issues and help you both grow and thrive together.

If you find yourself or your partner consistently evading relationship responsibilities, don’t hesitate to seek professional help. Couples therapy can be an excellent way to work through any underlying issues and establish healthy communication and shared commitments.

Thank you for taking the time to read this article. We hope you found it informative and entertaining. And remember, when it comes to excuses for avoiding responsibilities in a relationship, don’t let them hold you back. Take charge and create a fulfilling, accountable dynamic with your partner.

We thought you might be interested in this article as well, Tackling ‘I’m not interested!

Here is another post on this topic you might find useful is, How to Respond to Your Partner!


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